Confidence – if your singing career’s gone to crap, just get your tits out!

What the fuck’s going on in the world? I thought I had a fair handle on it all, the 80’s were over and even The Church Of Scientology was failing to help Kate Ceberano from fading into obscurity where she belongs. All of a sudden everywhere I turn, on bus shelters and the appropriately-obsolete phone boxes there she is: moose-jawed, proud-as-punch, showing off her tits.

Those who know me will understand how out-of-character it is for me to complain about tits on display – I’m a big fan of breasts. I guess, I just don’t really need Kate’s. Again, I’m glad she’s not singing and before everyone goes mental – yes, I do applaud the use of models with real bodies as opposed to the photoshopped, surgically-enhanced skeletons who resemble pre-pubescent boys that we’re usually bombarded with.

What I don’t like is the Ceberano. Considering all the impoverished but talented, hard-working musicians out there, Kate Ceberano has made a killing out of being complete bollocks. It’s an insult, it’s a travesty, it gives me the CUNT!!! And then to top it all off, when she should have crawled off to die quietly in a corner somewhere, when even the deaf wankers who liked her have forgotten her and jumped on the Andrea Bocelli band-wagon, she turns up again as wank-fodder for the homeless. I’m fucked if I understand this move, the campaign is just so crass.

Is it just denial? Is she so out of touch she feels that a flash of the norks is a way back into the ears of Australia? Is it just another piece of couch-jumping-maniacally-optimistic craziness? Hey, yeah – bugger integrity, let’s just plumb the depths of desperation and do a dodgy lingerie campaign: sex sells records, Kate, and fuck knows you’ve never had anything to offer as an artist, this may be the career defibrillation you need – get ’em out!!! Kate Ceberano gives me roaring-vindaloo shits and I wish she would just put them away and fuck the fucking-fuck off!

4 Responses to “Confidence – if your singing career’s gone to crap, just get your tits out!”

  1. yes!!!!!!! Exactly I hate that ad too…. It makes boobs look unattractive… and her even more like the fuckwit that she is… gah! arhg! ;(*&TOHJL*&T%(&*)%

    yes. *ahem*

    anayways.,… that is my anger vented for the day too…

  2. I don’t who she is, but I guess I’m glad I don’t.

    Tits at a bust..op: not a bad idea in principle. I’m perpl..ayt..exed why it isn’t more popular 🙂

  3. Like they haven’t photoshopped the fuck out of ol’ Katie, thinned her down a bit, mopped up the wrinkles. Looking less like a 41 year old every day. Nothing like a body double to give you “confidence” too. Looks like they photoshopped her head onto someones hot body. advertising sucks. bunch of cunts if you ask me.

  4. Old Gregg Says:

    I was reading about this ad campaign the other day and thinking to myself, I wonder what Buck would make of this…

    Kate Ceberano is the ultimate target of rage-ventage.

    Also, “wank-fodder for the homeless” – another stunner.

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